Tuesday, April 20, 2010

A Beautiful Morning!

So, this was the second night on graveyard.  I had a loooong night!  But, I was awake!  It was nice to get out of work early...I was going to go straight to bed, but I decided to swing by yoga.  I haven't been in about 2 months.  I really miss it.

I had a very neat experience.  I had a friend call it a "grounding" experience, where your soul fully connects with your body.  I don't know how to explain it.

I was in a deeper than usual meditation...I noticed it in three different poses.  The first pose, the bottom of my feet were cool, not cold.  As if I just stepped barefoot into a nice patch of soft, spongey, moist ground.  The next pose, my fingers were gently being pulled back and forth, like a gentle breeze on branches...the last pose was feeling like my arms were spread wide, and unmoving...like big branches.  It hit me then...I was a tree.  It was such a neat experience...I cannot describe it.  It was beautiful, strange, wonderful, and familiar.

I also found a blooming tree that had blossoms in the shape of a heart!!!  Here's a pic!  It was lovely!  I know that the earth has beautiful and pleasant surprises...so, is this organized chaos?  A beautiful accident?  Or a gnome shaping our spring time to make it more joyous for those that can see it for it's really beauty.

May everyone have a joyous spring!!!

Chelle }}i{{

Monday, April 19, 2010

Home Schooling, The Internal Struggle

So, I have a few online friends that home school, I've learned a lot from them, and have used them in daily things for Xander.  Not a regular thing, but something will trigger a blog post I've read, and I'll try to wedge the message in some how.

I was visiting with a woman in my church.  She just pulled her kids out of the school Xander will be attending next year.  The things she told me were rather appalling.  She said she learned things about her teacher that her daughter picked up that one should not know unless good friends, let alone through a child.  Her kid's teacher informed them VERY late in the year (or not at all) about how bad their children were doing...when there were no notes, no progress reports, etc.  How can you help your child when things like that happen?  So, she finally pulled her kids out.

They are doing VERY well!  She has a Christian-based educational program.

This is my questions on this, I would LOVE a Christian-based schooling, but also a natural approach too.  Everytime I'm teaching him about something, it always seems to be when we're outdoors, and it's related to nature.  I guess for me, when I'm in nature, it's where everything makes sense.  It's where I'm my calmest and most reflective.  The world and my mind seem to open up.

It's where I can't get cell reception, nor TV, where the only thing I have is, my imagination, my thoughts, and myself (well most of the time now, I have Xander in tow.)  But he's is drawn into that world too.  He's so full of life and energy, but I've noticed, he's mellower, he listens to me so much better!  Could it be in my genes, passed down to my son?

I was talking to Aaron tonight about possibly home-schooling Xander.  He sighed and said, "I know, it's all up to me, if I can get a good paying job so you can stay home."

He's right.  If I could be a stay at home mom, I would be so content!  I really hate to put that burden on him, but he's been trying for years.  He wants me home too (only because he knows I want it.  He is not demanding it.)  I see all these mom's all around me that are stay-at-homes and they complain that they don't get out, that they wish they could trade places....I'm sorry, but I wouldn't.  To not have to work for people who don't appreciate you (the guests, my bosses are great!), to be able to cook EVERY meal at home (it's relaxing to me!  I put on music and Xander helps!  It's so fun!).

I admit, sometimes it can be difficult, but to see my son with that sparkle in his eye, the hug and our kiss that he only does with just me (we peck and rubbed our noses!!), It's worth every bit of it.  To take every moment I have and spend it with him, reading a book, discovering a pirate treasure, making cup cakes...oh the things we would do!!!!!

Well, hopefully I'll have some more time to start the search once I graduate in a month!  Yea!!!

Chelle }}i{{

Friday, April 16, 2010

Minature Disasters :-)

So, Xander and I took a quick trip down to California.  We went to see and old friend, and a new, but "old" friend.

We stayed in Hayward at her house, I wanted to see them, Sangeeta's mom is not doing to good, she has cancer and has been doing pretty well, but has recently taken a turn for the worst.  So, we went down to say hi, we haven't seen them in a couple of years, but we still talk on the phone.  It was too quick, but nice to go and visit.  I'm hoping to go down there again soon!!  The boys had sooo much fun together!!!  :-)

We then went up to meet up with Chels and her daughter Amelie in Bodega Bay...it was starting off to be a very nice day the sun was out, the wind was low and it was just amazing!!  We went to an art gallery for a showing of paintings that were all about Buddhism...it was very neat to see!!

Then Chels accidently put one tire of her car in a ditch!  Oh no!!  I started laughing.

I felt so bad for laughing!  But, I'm one of those that I either laugh or cry...This is why I sometimes laugh at inapproriate times...But the main reason I laughed, is because I am car trouble proned...it should have been me!  I'm always loosing my keys, or having a flat...

We ended up at a ranger's station because there was NO cell service!  I know, California with no cell service!  I would expect it in Death Valley, but not there!!  The kids had fun, they found a couple of muddied water holes and threw rocks in them.

So then, after Chels got a hold of a tow truck, we sat across the road chatting while the children played near a cliff drop off...we snacked and played.

The tow truck came, and the car ended up with minimal damage!  Yea!!!  We even saw some whales even!!  Well, that or three rocks...we swore they were moving!!!

We headed to a lovely beach next.  It was so fun!  Oh, how I miss it!!  The roar and silence all in one!  It was beautiful!!  The kids had so much fun!  The water was cold and refreshing...bordering on too cold!  I LOVE the ocean!  You feel so small there.  In our lives we sometimes are only concerned with things that are immediatly surrounding ourselves.  To take sometime, in good company, and reflect that we're not the only ones' here...that life is not all about us...it's all about EVERYONE!  We are all connected somehow some way.

The kids buried our feet, then buried our feet.  They picked up tons of shells and had a fun time doing it!!!

As soon as I got in the car, my ipod came on, and the song "Minature Disasters" by K.T. Tunstall came on.  I just laughed!  It was such an ironic moment!!!

Then, we went to a deli and had rubber sandwhiches while vulters circled over head....THEY were HUGE!!

I headed back home through Napa/Sonoma and was in awe of all the beauty there!!!  Then swung by my aunts house in Fairfield for a couple hours.  It was neat to see them for a minute!  My Mom and Grandparents were even there!  :-)

All in all, it was a quick, but fun trip!!!  I relaxed, felt peace, visited with good friends, and had a wonderful time!  Can't wait to go back!!!!

Sometimes, life choses what happens to us.  We can either sit back and enjoy the moment it brings or stress from it.  I do stress often, but I'm trying to make these "Disasters" minature...because, it usually ends up well in the end.  :-)

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Feeling Very Humble Tonight

So, I'm at my friends' house in Hayward, I'm visiting just for tonight and then heading out tomorrow.  Her mom is a sweet, sweet soul, and she has been battling cancer for years.  Well, it's now in her brain, liver and lungs.

Seeing her today, she looked so gaunt, but her spirit was shinning.  I told her she has raised wonderful children, and she just started to cry, saying that they are the only things she has left.  I just started to cry...the twinkle had left her eye.

We had a wonderful day, we ate at a great meal at a Persian place.  Then had ice cream, and then we got back, and Xander and I went to bed to nap.

We woke up and had a good evening.  Her mom imerged from her room to eat.  Her throat has been hurting so bad since the radiation started.

I was on the phone, and at one point, she was screaming at my friend saying she can't eat anymore and to give her a couple days.  I just wanted to cry.  She was so sad, and I can understand...I think she's done, she's tired of fighting, but she's hanging on for her kids and grandkid.

I know her kids are just hanging on, because she was such a wonderful, joyous person...now a gaunt hollow shell.  I just hope that she can go in peace and that her kids will let her go in peace.

It makes me so greatful to believe in another life, to know that there IS something out there.  To know my father is there waiting for me.  It'll be a year this coming August.  I can't believe it.

We go through life hoping and fending off the inevitable...death.  I just hope that when my time comes, I'll have no regrets, that I'll be happy knowing that I lived MY life to it's fullest.

Chelle }}i{{

Thursday, April 8, 2010

A Fun, Educational Day!!!

What a fun day today!!! I had to get the car looked at, as I’m going to California next week. Virginia Lake, a lovely park that has an irrigation lake in the middle of bustling Reno. Virginia lake is beautiful, even with it’s own island in the middle, I call the island “bird island“. I don’t know what it’s official name is, I just know that it is big and full of all sorts of birds.

So, this park is only a little ways from our mechanic. We walked over. We listened to music on the way over, dancing to Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 soundtrack and then to KT Tunstall, a “new to me” artist. We danced the entire 7 blocks it took to get there, twisting, and twirling, not caring at all about what the cars whizzing past us thought. We looked absolutely ridiculous, and we had such fun doing it!!!

We sat on the edge of the water watching ducks do what they do best, dive and swim. He was so fascinated as they would disappear into a mess of bubbles and then pop back up some thirty seconds later.

We had a wonderful lesson. We talked about the different birds. He was able to tell the difference between ducks, geese and seagulls! We talked about their diets. We learned the three main meal groups. Omnivore, Carnivore and Herbivore.

He learned ways to tell the difference, by giving him clues within the description of the animals diets. For example, a duck, eats veggies, fruits and herbs. They are known as herbivores. A person (he pointed out a bear too!), eats ALL kind of food. They eat fruits, veggies, meat and OMelets, they are an OMnivore. Tigers, T-Rexes, and wolves eat meat, they are a (make a growling sound) *Arg*nivore (Carnivore).

So, it was fun and so educational! It was so fun associating words to help him along, I thought I’d share this fun, wonderful day!!!!
Chelle }}i{{

Tuesday, April 6, 2010


I'm sick.  I've been sick for a week.  Xander's sick, but doing better.  My nose is so clogged, I'm having a really hard time sleeping.

Oh well, it's Friday!  :-)  Yeah!!  One day left until some full-time sleep coming!

Chelle  }}i{{

Monday, April 5, 2010

Everything I Know, I Learned From The Beatles

Ok, so I was playing Beatles Rock Band last night (a friend let me barrow it!), and I had an epiphany.  I LOVE the Beatles, always have.  I was thinking that I've learned several lessons in life that are reflected in their songs.  Enjoy!

Everything I Know, I Learned From The Beatles

One, and one, and one is three

I can get by with a little help from my friends

I HAS been a hard days night

All you need is love

I would LOVE to see an octopus’s garden

We should ALWAYS sing Happy Birthday

I'll take my broken wings and learn to fly again

We should come together, right now

Life's beautiful and so am I

Yes, I want to know a secret, we all do

Everyone is hiding, except the monkey

If we wanted to, we could have 8 days in a week


You can drive my car

Never ask a woman name Eleanor where she keeps her head, it’s not polite

It’s never to late to get back to where you once belong

I’m not a walrus, I’m THE walrus…coocoo cachoo

It’s fun to hold a hand

I’m a lover, not a dancer

We all need help sometimes

There will be answer

Never anger a man named Maxwell, he has a hammer.

My name is Michelle, and I am a belle

I love strawberries

Sometimes, the most abstract things make perfect sense

Yes, I'm going to be a star, even if it's just in my own world

Life goes on

Take a sad song, and make it better

Let it be

Here comes the sun, and it’s better than alright, it’s beautiful

We all should know better

You know I love you

Marshmallow pies are tasty

There will always be a scapegoat, Yoko was the Beatles

Sitar is both fun to say and to hear played

Think for yourself

There is NEVER too much monkey business

We can work it out

I will still need you at 64

I don’t live in a submarine, but it would be fun!

Sunday, April 4, 2010

An Instruction Manual For Kids

**I had to write a discussion paper on "Behavioral Self-Reinforcement" for class. I chose parenting. This is what I came up with. I thought it worth sharing, as anyone who is a parent has been through this! enjoy! Chelle }}i{{**

An Instruction Manual for Kids

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if children did come with an instruction manual? In a way they do, us. We take bits and pieces of our life as a child, add a pinch of being an example, and there you have it! Sounds like an easy recipe, right?

Being a mother, I have moments of failure, I think, “why doesn’t he listen to me? I must not be a good parent!” After discussing this inadequacy fear with other parents, this thought seems to be a common one. They bounce around, run off, and talk back to you, only for one reason, they are testing you, and your limits.

To compound upon our feelings of being a “bad parent”, we have other people telling us how to raise our child. Parents, grandparents, siblings, even perfect strangers will intercede. While their mission is usually good, sometimes the advice is not. We need to take the advice with a grain of salt and research on our own what is best for our child, for every child is different and responds differently.

“Both our nature, what is born in us, and our nurture, how we are conditioned, define who we are and what we believe. What we allow into our consciousness, therefore, weighs heavily on what we will become.” -C. Woolf.

It is said that we (as parents) need to apply appropriate discipline, stating that older children will need different punishments than younger ones. You have to remember your in charge. There is such a thing as loving, but firm parenting. Giving your child appropriate boundaries for their age is essential. Giving them a little freedom, is essential too. We must be willing to take some risk, this helps them ingrain in their mind consequences vs. choices.

There is a fear emerging of crushing a child’s spirit, thus turning the tables to where the child is in control, not the parent. How many times in a store do with see a child throwing a fit because they can’t get what they want (if you’re a parent, we’ve all been there, sort of a right of passage). Pay attention next time, see what the parent does, give in or not? Do they threaten or explain? Threatening a child with unreasonable threats is not the way to go, if you cannot follow through with the threat, it is not a “good” threat. What is a good threat? Something that will teach your child a lesson without causing serious trauma. For example, taking away toys or favorite things for a certain amount of time or time-outs.

The last thing, but most important thing I want to bring up is education. Parents need to stay active in a child’s education, we are usually the main “conditioner”. While schools are a great place of learning, children will apply and retain most of this knowledge within the home. Children are sponges, they absorb everything we say and do, (sometimes to my chagrin). One of my favorite things to do is take daily life, and turn it into a lesson. Two of my favorite impromptu lessons was a walk, where we discovered our shadows, and my son playing with several different sized balls turned into the solar system.

When using these points in life, we will still have feelings of inadequacy and people telling us we’re “doing it wrong.” But, when your child is independent, knowledgeable, and respectful, all those feelings and voices seem to melt away.




Saturday, April 3, 2010

General Conference

I love General Conference!  Every 6 months, we get to listen to the prophet in out pj's.  :-)

My favorite so far was Pres. Monson at the very begining, and the only talk I've been able to hear.  I finally had to give up and watch it later.  I keep telling Xander he needs to be quite, because it's like church.  But, he's sick, and he's getting ancy, and keeps interupting me.  So, instead of getting grumpy and putting him in time out over it, I'm just going to watch it later.  Thank you DVR!!!  :-)

Now, we're going to turn on some music and dye easter eggs!  :-)


Chelle }}i{{

Friday, April 2, 2010

Trying to Re-Organize My Life

Alright, so after an almost year hiatus, I'm going to try getting back into the swing of things.  I would like to re-start my 101 things in 1001 days.  I looked back and was both surprised and disappointed.  While I crossed off some majors goals, I let the little, important ones slipped through the cracks.

This past year, I have had a lot of time to reflect.  I've started (and hopefully will finish school) I've started a band and we have recorded a song!  Tilt-O-Whirl.  Pretty cool.

My dad died, I've had surgery and a couple of major procedures on my back.

I'm still working in a job I feel is keeping me from my son.  He seems to grow over night.  Everyday I discover new things he's just discovered.  It's wonderful!  I love how he reminds me of being a kid.  I love reconnecting with life this way.  :-)

Anyhoo, it's now time to get ready and head to work.